Intimacy: Passion or Pleasure?
Chao et al. (2011) found that as age increases people have less intimate contact or sexual activity with their partner (p.387). However, as age increases, sexual desire for intimacy remains stables and even arouses more often than not. It is during middle adulthood where sexual satisfaction becomes just as important, if not more important, as sexual activity. Most common stereotypes about middle-aged adults in relation to sexual intercourse are: they’re not as attractive anymore, they’re not as interested in the opposite sex as they used to be, or they do not have a sexual desire. All of these stereotypes are highly misconstrued! In fact, Landau et al. (2007) reported than many middle-aged adults are very sexually active, with more than 75% of men ages 57-85 acknowledging themselves as “very well endowed”, while more than 50% of middle-aged women. Nonetheless, it was found that women still needed a sense of commitment, while men still considered intercourse as just “sex”, even at middle age.
Dr. John Bancroft (2002) also discusses sexual dysfunction among men and women that may also pose for differences in the ways middle-aged men and women experience sexual intimacy and pleasure. He suggested that women's inhibition towards sexual intimacy may be due to culture bound influences. Where as men view sexual desire as a necessity for reproduction, many women are looked down upon for sexual expression (Archives of Sexual Behavior, October 2002). In 2000, critics used supporting research from the Kinsey Institute to indicate that that emotional health and personal relationship factors were more important for women’s sexual satisfaction than achieving orgasm. In that survey, general well-being ranked at the top as a requirement, followed by emotional reactions during lovemaking, the attractiveness of one’s partner, physical response to lovemaking, frequency of sexual activity with one’s partner, the partner’s sensitivity, one’s own state of health, and the partner’s state of health. It was also found that testosterone is a much stronger determinant in men's overall sexual interest in men (Archives of Sexual Behavior, October 2002).
Dr. John Bancroft (2002) also discusses sexual dysfunction among men and women that may also pose for differences in the ways middle-aged men and women experience sexual intimacy and pleasure. He suggested that women's inhibition towards sexual intimacy may be due to culture bound influences. Where as men view sexual desire as a necessity for reproduction, many women are looked down upon for sexual expression (Archives of Sexual Behavior, October 2002). In 2000, critics used supporting research from the Kinsey Institute to indicate that that emotional health and personal relationship factors were more important for women’s sexual satisfaction than achieving orgasm. In that survey, general well-being ranked at the top as a requirement, followed by emotional reactions during lovemaking, the attractiveness of one’s partner, physical response to lovemaking, frequency of sexual activity with one’s partner, the partner’s sensitivity, one’s own state of health, and the partner’s state of health. It was also found that testosterone is a much stronger determinant in men's overall sexual interest in men (Archives of Sexual Behavior, October 2002).
Clip from "Sex and the City"
This clip demonstrates the different ways men and women in middle age view commitment in relationships. |
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